Friday, January 07, 2005

Broken vessel willing to be used

It's amazing to how quickly satan tries to discourage me here at school. It 's only been three days and the feelings have hit. Tired, overwhelmed, inadequate. The thing is, it's true. I am unable to do this on my own. I cannot survive this semester without Your strength, God. I will be depending on You fully this semester, in so many areas of my life--school, my daily witness in phi mu, sharing my faith with the women You have placed on my heart: Elizabeth, Nicole, Taylor, Zandy, and Jamie--Father, I still feel so young in my faith, so much to learn and experience and understand about Your character. Will we grow intimate this semester? Will I hear Your heartbeat; hear Your still, small voice; see You in this house? I hope that I will not live for the future, but use everyday as an opportunity to glorify You. To serve You, pushing aside my desires, and pointless 'needs'.

Lord, be my first Love, don't let my heart be led astray to other things that take my focus off You...idols. Break me, God...break my will. Break my heart for the people around me. Let me know deeply how much You love them and how much they are dying. I want to weep for their souls, cry in joy and awe over what You have done for me, and then have the boldness to go and share with them what You have done for them.

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